Eleanor looked at her cat suspiciously.
“I know it’s not you talking to me, so why do I think that it is?”
“Of course it’s me who is talking to you, Ella. Who else would it be?” said Muse. Or at least, possibly Muse.
“Cats can’t speak. That’s not possible.”
“Of course we can speak; we’ve always been able to speak. You just need a certain type of human to understand us.”
“A crazy one?” spluttered Eleanor, dropping into a chair.
“We prefer the term ‘open-minded’ as opposed to crazy. One doesn’t like to think we are living with unstable humans, after all.”
“Oh yes, I can understand that,” said Eleanor faintly. “Er, why have I never heard you before now?”
“You just weren’t listening right, dear. I’ve been communicating with you for quite some time now, but you’ve been rather distracted.”
“I need a drink.”
“Not the vodka, please, Ella dear.”
“Wine is much better; more refined for a lady.”
“I’ve never pretended to be a ‘lady’, Muse,” snorted Eleanor, who was now enjoying the conversation, no matter how bizarre it seemed. She decided she was dreaming, and if that was the case, she would indulge in some vodka, even if it was far too early in the day.
In the spirit of embracing her dream, Eleanor decided to confide in Muse about her embarrassing encounters with Charming, culminating in the recent flashing of her bottom. Muse was very understanding, and offered advice on her predicament.
“You should try to be more careful when you are out and about, my dear. I would definitely advise clothes that aren’t easy to come off, for example. And perhaps you should leave the high heels at home in the future.”
“I wasn’t wearing heels or loose fitting clothes when I got stuck in the elevator,” pointed out Eleanor, as she downed a double vodka.
“No dear, but you weren’t being careful, were you, or you would have noticed your jacket getting caught in the door.”
“That’s true,” she sighed. “I can’t help it, though. That man makes me nervous.”
“Maybe so, but you need to keep your wits about you. By the by, I strongly advise putting the lid back on that bottle. Your father is due in half an hour, and unless I’m mistaken, you still haven’t put the chicken in the oven.”
“Ella, please try to use a more ladylike refrain in the future. That isn’t very becoming language for a lady to use.”
“You sound like Christie.”
Muse sniffed and walked out of the room with her tail in the air. Eleanor giggled, then pinched herself.
Double crap. She hadn’t been dreaming after all. Biting her lip, she grabbed the phone and punched in Jake’s number. After a few rings, the phone was answered and Jake’s voice tinkled over the line.
“What’s up, sweetie?”
“Jake, I think I’m losing my mind.”